This episode of The ShiftShapers Podcast is called “Finding Happiness When Success Isn’t Enough” and today, host and Chief Transformation Strategist David Saltzman is joined by Freda Doxey, Founder of the A Wise Coaching and Counseling Company. Freda begins by sharing some of her tools and techniques to deal with the stresses of 2020.
She goes on to explain the differences between internal and external stress and breaks down the 3 parts of internal stress: What am I thinking? What are the emotions attached to it? And what do I believe?
And to round up the episode, Freda explains the need for a coach and its particular differences with a mentor and a sponsor. She also answers the crucial question of how to find life’s happiness when success is not enough and the roles of helpfulness, satisfaction, and mindfulness in this equation.
What You’ll Learn From this Episode:
- 03:46 Stress in sales: Differentiating internal and external stress
- 08:20 3 parts of internal stress
- 12:50 Boundaries and saying no in sales
- 15:49 Knowing your focus and delegating
- 18:45 Finding happiness when success is not enough
04:07 “So with stress, it can be internal or external. And in sales, because I did sales as well with Dale Carnegie, it can be internal where you put the pressure on yourself. And it is that stress sometimes that is not managed well that creates a place where we do not perform well, and our people who we try to sell to can pick up on any internal stress.”
04:35 “Now, external stress, we will always have. Whether it’s from family or from the manager or from the company, you can always have external stress because the business model is simply, do more, faster, with less resources. So you’ll have the external. Once we learn how to manage the internal stress, then we can easily manage the external stress. But most of the times, we do not differentiate between the external and the internal.”
08:20 “And here’s the thing, there’s three parts to the internal stress, alright? So the first part for everyone who’s listening is, what am I thinking? You’ve got to analyze. How am I thinking and what am I thinking? Not so much why, but how and what. Second thing is, what are some of the emotions that attach to that particular thought that I am having? And here’s the core: what do I believe?”
12:50 “When I line up my schedule, when I decide where I’m going to go, what I’m going to do, I’ve got to be able to say no that this is not going to be most effective for me. And the more comfortable we get, we’re seeing how ‘no’ actually free us up to the yesses and life.”
18:56 “The insatiable desire. And that simply means along the same lines, you’re just talking about, will I ever be satisfied? And here’s the key that I taught to be satisfied: number 1, it’s not in things and stuff. Success is not measured by the things that we have. And here are some of the things: status. Status can be educational. It could be the number 1 top salesperson. It’s not measured in that.”